If You Give A Warbler A Cookie
by farklesparkleify
Summary: AU Klaine.  Blaine and the Warblers are at the Buckeyes game, and Blaine finds himsef falling for the cute attendant in their suite.  When the Warblers order cookies, what's next but to ask for a glass of milk?  The Quest begins...
1. If You Give A Warbler A Cookie

**A/N:**

**Hello The fantastic duo of S and H has returned! So…this will be a multi-chapter story, however I cannot promise constant updates for I, S, cannot post without the amazing H reading over my writing/helping me write, and even though we are cousins, we are not promised to see each other all that often. Any who…I have never been to a Buckeyes game, however I have been to many Hockey games, one of which I believe was against the Buckeyes. Any references to hockey cheers or traditions will be based off of my home team so I'm sorry if I am inaccurate.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing…except for this experience which I legitimately lived through…kinda… **

**P.S. HPontmercy practically wrote this. :P (Did not! I FARKLESPARKLEify wrote/created my fair share of this story! ) She had the idea… I typed/wrote/self-beta'd… Note the double spaces… but I was not alone, Love you S. Check me out, I think I'm pretty cool. :D I love you all. **

**And note the continuing theme of chocolate chip cookies. O.o (Not on purpose…it just fit…because like I said…I lived this experience…)**

**LOVE YOUS! IF YOU LOVE ME, R/R.**

BLAINE POV

It was the first Buckeyes game of the hockey season and, as per usual the Warblers and I are getting settled in our suite at the Value City Arena. The Warblers and I have followed the attendant, who has hardly spoken to us other than, "104B is right here."

I turn to the attendant to thank him for letting us in, and my hazel eyes meet his glasz ones, and suddenly I can't think straight. _Wow those eyes are gorgeous…can I just live in those eyes? _I start to think, before realizing I'm probably drooling. _SNAP OUT OF IT ANDERSON! _ I chide myself before turning on my Dalton charm and thanking the attendant—Kurt, according to his name tag—and shooting him my most dapper smile.

"It's no problem," he blushes a little, giving his porcelain skin the cutest rose tint, _and CUT IT OUT BLAINE! _"Do you want the fridge unlocked?" he questions.

"That'd be great." I reply shooting him another thousand watt smile, accompanied by a wink— because winking at the incredibly attractive attendant is totally acceptable especially when its returned with that cute little grin.

After he unlocks the fridge he turns to me and says "I'll uh...be out in the hall… if you need anything just shout." before turning to leave. Half way to the door he turns, "Oh! My name is Kurt by the way." he adds his distinctive eyes shining.

"Oh, I know." I smile in reply, and with a blush he turns and leaves the room. As he leaves, I call after him, "Wait. I'm Blaine."

"Blaine. Okay."

I turn around, and am suddenly faced with snickers from Wes and David.

"Blainey-Boo has a crush!" Wes sing-songs as he grabs a Pepsi from the freshly unlocked fridge.

"What?" I question, feeling my face grow hot.

"You totally have the hots for the attendant!" David exclaims as if it's the most obvious thing in the world—but judging by my face, it probably is.

"What? Do not." I counter, defensively, but to no avail.

"Okay sure." Wes chuckles in response as he shares this _look_ with David.

"I don't!" I exclaim with finality, causing Wes and David to share a chuckle. "You know what? I'm gunna look at the menu...any preferences?" I ask loud enough for the whole room to hear.

"Pizza!" chorus Nick and Jeff.

"Chicken nuggets!" calls Cameron.

"NACHOS!" Thad cries from where he's sprawled across the couch, quickly followed by a "Yeah!" from Flint.

Then, this unspoken understanding flows through the room as we all lock eyes with each other yelling "COOKIES!" in perfect synchronization before bursting out laughing.

"Okay...so cookies, nachos, chicken nuggets, and pizza?" I chuckle, just confirming our order.

"Sounds good." Wes replies.

"Go tell the attendant lover boy!" David jokes.

Rolling my eyes I walk into the hall in search of that gorgeous chestnut hair. _Stop it Blaine. He's just the attendant. Not only will you probably NEVER see him again, but you also don't even know if he's gay._ Finally I spot him, resting on the pillar outside our suite, laughing with a curvy African-American girl, also in uniform. _And since when were the attendants allowed to wear skinny jeans? Because that is just NOT FAIR!_ I make my way up to Kurt and his coworker, clearing my throat as I reach them to get their attention. I feel slightly satisfied when he jumps, turning to me, a slight blush coloring his cheeks.

The girl with him breaks into a grin and walks away. I clear my throat again, this time nervous. "Umm, hi." I say, once I have collected myself.

"Hi… Can I help you?" He asks, curious.

"Umm… My friends and I wanted to order…." I begin awkwardly.

"Oh, okay…"

"Yeah. Umm. So. We wanted some… chicken nuggets."

"Chicken nuggets?"

"Yeah."

"Is that all?"

"Yes. I, I mean no. Also…" _What is wrong with you, Anderson? It's just a boy… A very, very attractive boy. _I steady myself, take a deep breath, and continue. "We needed nachos. And a pizza—"

"What do you want on top?"

"You..." I stop, horrified, then try to cover my tracks, "…should get me a mushroom pizza!"

"Mushrooms?" Kurt asks, cocking his head, looking as though he's trying not to die of embarrassment.

"Mushrooms." Mushrooms. Dammit, the boys will kill me.

"Is that all?"

I think for a second, knowing I'm missing something. "Oh, yeah. Cookies."

~oOo~

KURT POV

"Cookies. All right. Is that it now?" I ask, hoping he can think of something else, so he will stay.

"Yeah." _Darn. _I think, disappointed. At least I'll see him again when I bring him and his friends their food.

"Okay, I'll… get that for you."

"Okay. See you." He gives me an anxious half nod, then turns to leave.

~oOo~

BLAINE POV

I walk back into the suite, only to be greeted by the sound of wolf whistles and raucous cheering.

"Hey, man, what happened out there!" Jeff catcalls.

Nick echoes with, "Yeah, Blaine, you were out there a long time."

Several more cheers go up, and I feel like melting. Wes comes over and pats me on the shoulder, saying, "Hey man, just don't do something stupid like you did with Jeremiah." Oh, to be reminded of that is the last thing I need now.

"Yeah lover boy!"

"Whoo!"

"Shut up!" I demand, before retreating to my seat and a game of Angry Birds.

I pass the time on my iPhone waiting until the attendant walks through the door, my heart beating faster every moment.

~oOo~

Finally, a knock comes at the door. I jump up, and the laugher begins again.

"Hey, I got your guys' chicken nuggets, nachos, and pizza—with mushrooms—and—"

"Wait, mushrooms? Blaine!"

A collective groan rises from my fellow Warblers, who are obviously not thrilled with my split second decision-making. Kurt looks confused, but continues.

"—and some cookies." The failed pizza order is all but forgotten, and my friends swarm the attendant, who looks flustered and amused at being flocked by a swarm of teenage boys.

_Is he gay? I hope so—_suddenly, I hear, Jeff shout, "Where is the milk?"

"Hey, man, we need milk!"

"You can't have chocolate chip cookies without milk!"

"Fail, man, fail."

Feeling obligated to right my wrong, I cautiously approach Kurt to ask for some milk.

~oOo~

KURT POV

"Do you guys have any milk?" he asks, looking hopeful. "It wasn't on the menu, but you know, chocolate chip cookies need milk."

"Sadly, no, sorry."

There is a brief pause, and then I am hit by the force of his puppy-dog look.

"Do you think you could get a glass for me?" Blaine pouts, and I can't resist.

"I'll see what I can do."

Oh, what have I gotten myself into?

**FIN(N?)**

**Stay tuned. It's far from finished. Read and Review…tell us what you think **


	2. The Quest Begins

**A/N:**

**I'm baaaaccckkk Okay…so you know how I said this won't consistent updates because I don't get to see my amazing cowriter HPontmercy that often? Well I lied, kinda. So this I wrote without help (You should probably be able to tell the difference) Because of all of my lovely reviewers, subscribers, and favoriters who inspired me to get this all written and I didn't want to wait to see my cousin to post this. So here is what I'm asking. Please read this, then review on if this is okay and if you wouldn't mind more chapters like this (just purely written by me) or if this is just awful and I should just wait for my cousin to come co-write and edit with me…and please be honest, I'd rather post quality rather than quantity. **

**ALSO! The quest for milk needs hurdles for Kurt to cover, I can't promise I'll use all of them but suggestions please? Virtual hugs and inviso-bears for anyone who can give me one that leads to Kurt needing a sharpie… So review or PM me those pretty please with a cherry on top **

**Random fact: This whole chapter was typed in purple…**

**Less than three you all!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing **

KURT'S POV:

Milk...how in the heck was I supposed to get milk? It sounds like such a simple task, however if it's not on the menu, the Value City Arena doesn't have it. Simple as that. Only...I'd just stupidly told Blaine _(Whoa, I know his name now? This cannot be good…)_ that I could get him a glass of milk. Normally I would have just told him plain, "We don't have milk so sorry, but you don't get any", but those darn puppy dog eyes that were just the right shade of hazel, I just couldn't say no. No matter how loud my brain was screaming for me to do so, my heart (which is apparently the loudest organ I have) responded with a resounding "yes" which, thankfully, my brain edited to "I'll see what I can do" or I'd really be in for it now.

"Calling Chocolate Thunder. I repeat calling Chocolate Thunder." I hiss as I scurry back to my pillar position.

"Whoa, you're bringing out the code names? What did you DO White Boy?" Mercedes my best friend and coworker replies, falling into code names as if talking about the weather.

"I'm not exactly sure yet..." I murmur, not certain if I was even loud enough for her to hear.

"Kurt..." she begins, worry lacing her voice and her expression.

"Oh no, it's not like that." I hurry to explain, "I just...well I need to call a Code Pink." I mutter.

"A pink?" she questions, "Why?"

"Well...I..." I begin, suddenly finding the tile patterns extremely interesting, "You see...the boys in there ordered cookies, and as everyone knows, you can't very well have cookies without milk...and well...I kind of told them I could bring them some..." I trail off, finally looking Mercedes in the eyes.

"I fail to see why that requires a Code Pink White Boy." she challenges, not willing to let it slide that easily.

"Well..." I begin, rubbing at the back of my neck, "We don't serve milk." I mutter.

"Well then why did you say you could bring them some?" she questions. Shooting her my best 'Really? You have to ask that question?' look I await for the realization to hit. And when it does, I can practically see the light bulb above her head. "You like-? Oh my! So your gunna-?" she begins, but fails to finish her many questions.

"Yes I like Blaine, I know, it certainly is an 'Oh my!' realization, and yes I'm going to sneak out and run to the grocery store down the street to get that group of boys some milk to go with their damn cookies. Which is why I need to call a Pink and have you cover for me. Did I miss anything?" I rant.

"Nope. I think you got it all." she replies a smile itching across her face. "However you should get going if you plan on getting their milk to them by break." she adds.

"So you'll do it?" I ask excitedly, for we both know that if we get caught we'll both get fired.

"Of course I will!" she exclaims before pulling me into a hug muttering something about what she wouldn't do for love.

"I should go..." I say, turning to begin my journey to the store, only to stop when I hear Mercedes cough lightly behind me. Raising an eyebrow I turn to her, my eyes asking the question I don't bother to speak aloud 'why are you wasting my precious time?'

Her eyes responding with a 'hey don't shoot the messenger' look she says, "Don't you think you should know what kind of milk they want?"

"Why must you be right?" I resign, changing my path back to suite 104B.

~oOo~

BLAINE'S POV:

As soon as Kurt left, I was bombarded by Wes and David.

"Dude, I can't believe you pulled the puppy dog eyes on that guy." David says an undertone of chiding coloring his voice.

"Yeah man, that was harsh." Wes agrees with a sympathetic nod.

"Hey! You're the ones who wanted milk!" I attempt to defend myself, failing miserably, as my feeble attempt didn't come out as more than a burble.

~oOo~

"Just admit you have hot pants for the attendant and we'll let it go." Wes argues.

"I don't have hot pants for Kurt." I state in reply to the challenging looks I'm receiving from both him and David.

"That's debatable." David chuckles.

"Really? You're going to stoop as low as using the hockey chants on me now?" I whine. "Why don't you just…have an impromptu performance instead of bugging me." With a "Humph!" I turn around, only to be stalled by Wes singing an all too familiar tune "Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah yeah yeah." He sings before somewhere on the other side of the room Thad calls "For the last time Wes! We are NOT doing kpop!"

Chuckling, I sit back down in my chair out in the arena, digging into a slice of the mushroom pizza I've been assigned the task of eating due to my clever on the spot thinking.

~oOo~

I'd made my way back into the suite, and was in the midst of talking with Jeff and Nick, when I heard the door open. Instantaneously, I was turning and walking over toward the attendant who'd just entered.

"Hi." I smile as I reach him.

"Hey. So, I was on my way to the kitchen to look into the whole milk thing, and I realized I forgot to ask what kind of milk you wanted." He replies, just jumping right in and not wasting a moment.

"Oh, um, one percent?" I respond, the answer coming out more as a question.

"One percent. Got it." He smiles, "Anything else you want while I'm here?" he questions.

"Well, um." I begin, suddenly finding my shoes highly intriguing. "I used to come to these games with my parents and um…well…Brutus used to come in…and…well…I was wondering if he could come visit us?" I manage to stutter out, finally looking into his glasz eyes as I conclude.

"So some one percent milk and a visit from Brutus?" he questions with a raise of the eyebrow. Already feeling the blush spread, I decide to just nod versus a verbal response. "Alright, I can do that." He smiles before leaving.

~oOo~

KURT'S POV:

_Some one percent milk and a visit from Brutus, that's do able. _I mentally coach myself. _Just have to ask Mercedes to get Brutus to go in there, which will double as a distraction as I sneak down to the store…You can do this Hummel!_

"Cedes!" I hiss as I approach her. "Psst!"

"You ready to put this pink into action?" she questions, a look of excited anticipation painting her features.

"Yeah, yeah." I begin blinking to clear my mind a bit, "Just, can you get Brutus to visit them too?"

"Of course." She smiles, "What else are best friends for?" she enquiries pulling me into a hug.

"You, Mercedes, are the best friend ever." I state pulling back from the hug. Then, slipping into stealth mode, I begin my trek to the door. And so the quest begins.

**FIN(N?)**

**R&R por favor?**


	3. LEVEL ONE

**A/N: Song used last chapter was "Oh Yeah" by K-Pop band MBLAQ. That was courtesy of my (H's) friend Katie. She told S about them, and I actually surprisingly had nothing to do with that reference. Speaking of references, props to anyone who got the Anything Goes reference. :) **

**(Okay so S here sorry you don't see much of me here…Finals have arrived… anywho…I wrote like the first two paragraphs…all the rest was HPontmercy so CHECK HER OUT! Because she is my cousinbuddy and I live her (yes I do mean live))**

**Anyway, here is where the real plot begins. We've just been setting up but now the quest starts for once and for all. Enjoy!**

**DISCLAIMER: We don't own the Glee. Or Kurt. Or Blaine. Or, sadly, any of the Warblers. But if we did, that would make midterms so much easier. ;-P (S: Study Buddies!)**

KURT POV:

Being discreet was never something Kurt Hummel strove to do. He loved his flamboyant clothing, distinctive voice, and his "take no prisoners" attitude, all of which make him stand out against others and be noticed. However, at this point in time, remaining unseen was on the top of his to do list, well, that and to stop thinking in third person.

LEVEL ONE: SNEAKING OUT

Getting those Warbler boys their milk is going to be difficult. Our kitchens don't stock it, except for use in coffee, and if I wanted to steal it, I'd have to deal with Gertie, our ferocious, Canadian head cook. We've had our altercations in the past, and the last thing I want to do is cement my place on her bad side. So that leaves one alternative: Getting it myself.

There's a grocery store down the street, a couple of blocks away. It would take me less than ten minutes to get there and back. Unfortunately, my boss is like a hawk. He runs the stadium like a ship, with all the waiters punching their times to the second, moving as efficiently as possible. There's no way I can get out without getting caught, but I promised I'd get Blaine and his Warbler friends milk to go with their chocolate.

Something about those gorgeous hazel eyes made me want to mean it.

So I have to try. I glance around, checking to make sure that the coast is clear, before silently leaving the 100 hall of the arena. I walk lightly, though I know the volume of my footsteps will be irrelevant if I am found leaving work. I'm already on thin ice, as last week Mercedes and I were busted for 'busting a move' to Madonna and Justin Timberlake's "4 Minutes." Let's just say the old ladies we were serving didn't find our dancing too appropriate. But hey, we don't choose the play list...we may pay Bobby in tech 40 bucks a week to make sure he uses our iPods, but that doesn't make it our fault when "Defying Gravity" comes on in the middle of a game.

Anyway, it had been hard enough getting a job at the same place as my best friend, and I'm not about to sacrifice it for some guy... some really cute guy... But I promised him and his friends I would get them milk. And I always keep my promises.

I duck into an abandoned stairwell, looking over my shoulder as I shut the heavy door behind myself. I start downstairs, but wince as the sounds of my footfalls echo off the concrete walls. I fear I'm being too loud.

Just then, I hear the door open a flight above me. I freeze, hoping to look as inconspicuous as possible while obviously sneaking out. My heart stops when the footsteps reach my landing. It's my boss, Mr. Owens.

"Kurt?" The portly rink owner questions, "What are you doing?"

I gulp, trying to think of a plausible reason for taking the cold staircase instead of the posh elevator.

"I-I needed to get to the kitchens ASAP, and the elevator was full..." I fudge, stuttering too much to look convincing.

"...So you took the back stairs?" I nod.

"Yeah. I figured it would be... faster."

Mr. Owens' quizzical expression melts to one of understanding. He smirks. "Kurt, are you sure you weren't sneaking out to meet a girl?"

I almost choke on my heart as it beats high in my throat. "G-girl?" I stammer, feeling my face turn red. Mr. Owens has no idea I'm gay, which is probably a good thing. Something tells me I wouldn't have a job if he knew.

He laughs, but his face turns stony. "Hummel, your break isn't for another hour. Whoever she is, she can wait."

"Mr. Owens!" I protest. "There is no girl!" I hope he can tell I'm honest; after all, there is no girl. Maybe a cute prep school boy, but only if I can manage to complete my mission. And that can only happen if I get away from this awkward confrontation without losing my job.

I get the questioning look again, but Mr. Owens looks like he wants to believe me. "Still, son, why'd you decide to take the stairs? You got something to hide?"

I take a deep breath, think for a second, and then it hits me. "This guy from school was in the elevator... and I really didn't want to deal with him." I make my face believable by picturing the countenance of my tormentor from school, Dave Karofsky.

He seems to buy it, but his squinty, bespectacled eyes look dubious. Regardless, he claps a beefy hand to my shoulder. "Fine," he says, "I get it, but next time, face him like a man, alright?"

Cringing at my boss' sow of support, I twist my face into a semblance of a grateful smile. "Thanks, Mr. Owens, I will."

"Now, go do whatever it is you were about to do. Just don't let me catch you taking any breaks," he says, showing his slightly yellowed teeth. I duck out of his grasp, as he turns and heads back up the stairs, waddling slightly. I race down the stairs to the lower level, where, instead of taking a left to the kitchen, I veer right to the exit. Dashing out to the street, I plot my course for the grocery store down the street.

I've made it past the first, and hopefully most challenging, obstacle of my "Quest for Milk," but sadly, there was no Scott Pilgrim-esque payoff. If I get caught sneaking out, I could definitely use the spare change.

I duck out into the crisp fall air, ready for whatever life decides to throw at me, to get in the way of the Warblers and their milk.

~oOo~

BLAINE POV

"So, I wonder how long it's gonna take that waiter to bring us our milk," says Thad as he rattles off a text to his girlfriend.

"Dude," Flint states, plopping down next to him, and pulling out his phone. "I just want to see Brutus!"

Wes and David roll their eyes. "We all know Blaine can't wait until that _dreamy _waiter comes back!" Jeff catcalls, followed by whistles from Nick. The boys have been snickering at me since Kurt left. Wes and Nick finally dropped it, knowing I'm sensitive about guys I like. And I really. Like. Kurt.

Jeff and Nick go on for several minutes, but the rest of the Warblers have resigned to watching the game.

"Some of us actually like hockey," intones Wes, looking peeved. Nick and Jeff quiet down, but keep shooting me mocking looks.

I glare back at them, then as if aware that we need a distraction, the buzzer goes off, signaling that the Buckeyes have scored.

Cheers erupt throughout the box, and I fade into the background.

**FIN(N?)**

**A/N**

**98% written by H. :D the intro was mostly S, I helped with the wording. Then it was all me. S is studying for her finals. I probably should be too. Ah, high school. (Silly finals first time….not fun )**

**:D**

**Hope you like! Wish you'd love! R&R? *tries Blaine's puppy dog eyes (but to no avail, because I'm not that cute. :P)**

**Oh and the asking for challenges still stands! And if you give one that involves a sharpie we will give you a sneak peek, or a drabble or something Or a suggest-fic. Or something.**


	4. LEVEL TWO

**A/N: Here is a long overdue update!**

**_***READ*: This chapter holds some names. If these will trigger you in any way shape or form, please DON'T read. PM me and ask for a summary or just skip the Kurt POV, but please do not take the risk if this proposes any.**_**

**Does anyone actually read this? If so...leave a comment saying some form of hello :)**

**The idea for this chapter comes from my (S) amazing friend R :)**

**Okay...so...I don't know if you guys think we are going to bite you or something...but I just wanted to let you know that reviews are welcome :) in fact, we encourage them...we've even asked for suggestions in our fic via reviews or PM's so...please...feel free to drop us a line...even if it's just to say hello :) Because...we'd really like to know our readers :) Please please PLEASE! Review :) (Sorry to beg for reviews but...we've gotten soooo many favorites and story alerts...and we are SOOO grateful for that...but we'd really like to know what you guys think...and we did ask for suggestions for a reason...that reason being...we need some creative minds...) So please (!) Review!**

**Sorry to sound so ungrateful :(**

**Disclaimer: Not ours :( Sadly... ):**

Stepping out into the brisk November air, a thrill of exhilaration rushed through me. I normally am such a rule follower, sneaking around like this just feels so rightly wrong. Quickly looking both ways, I make my way across the street.

I make it about halfway down the block when from behind me I hear a call of, "Hey fag." Turning around I'm faced with the sight of Karofsky and Azimio clad in their letterman jackets. I roll my eyes before just turning around and continuing my journey to the store, not wanting to deal with them at the moment. I feel a heavy hand fall on my shoulder before I'm turned face to face with Karofsky. "I _said_'Hey fag'." he growls, warm breath fanning over my face.

"And I ignored you." I reply, trying to pull away.

"I don't appreciate being ignored fairy." Karofsky barks in response.

"Well you should learn to." I reply hotly, pulling away and taking a few steps away.

"Or maybe I should teach you a lesson." He snarls grabbing my wrist attempting to turn me around again, instead he pulls to hard and I lose my balance falling to the ground. He quickly adjusts himself so he's towering over me. "When someone says hello, you're supposed to say hi back." he says, emphasizing each word with a kick. Cringing into myself I try to avoid the blows. After a few more kicks, he stops, "Now, let's try this again," he growls, "hey fag."

"Hello Karofsky." I mumble trying to recompose myself.

"Better." He smirks, as he and Azimio share a laugh, before they turn to leave. I look up from my fetal position just in time to see Karofsky jumping back onto the sidewalk as a car zooms past, had I searched my mind at that moment, I would have found a thought somewhere along the lines of 'Karma truly is a bitch isn't it?'. Once they're gone, I pull myself back up and continue my trek to the store.

**~oOo~**

BLAINE POV:

The score is 13 to 9, the Buckeyes in the lead. With the slight lull in the game, Nick and Jeff have decided to start a game of Bang Kill or Marry.

"Harry freaking Potter, Darren Criss, or...Blaine Anderson." Flint challenges.

"Hmm...well," Jeff says, putting on his thinking face.

"Oh no...Jeff's thinking." Nick calls mockingly.

"Ha-ha very funny." Jeff dead pans. "Well, I'd off Blaine." He amends nonchalantly.

"Hey!" I call, placing a hand to my heart in mock offence.

"Well, it's simple logic, you're not famous, nor are you magical, therefore, you get offed." Jeff explains, and as odd as it is, I can actually follow his logic. "I'd bang Harry freaking Potter, because, let's face it, it would have to be _magical_." he continues, making sure to put extra emphasis on the word magical, "And I'd marry Darren Criss." he finishes.

Nodding his approval, Nick turns to me, "Blaine. Spoon, fork or knife."

I tilt my head in thought before replying, "I have a feeling this is going to say a lot about me as a person." This elicits a laugh from the group before I continue, "Well, I'd off the knife, because knives are dangerous. I'd marry the spoon, because, well, spoons are the least violent of them all. And I'd bang the fork because it's the only one left."

"Very well thought out Blaine-ferd" Wes chuckles.

"Blaine-ferd?" I question. "That's...new."

"You needed a more official sounding name for that comment." Wes defends himself. "Oh! I got a good one. Blaine."

"I just went!" I cry in response.

"But it's a good one!" He pleads. I sigh in defeat, and nod for him to continue. "Okay, so Tom Felton, Chris Colfer, or Kurt the attendant."

"Not fair!" I whine.

"Oh just answer." Jeff chides.

**~oOo~**

KURT POV:

The rest of the walk wasn't too bad, and I made it to the store relatively quickly. Now, I just have to get the milk.

LEVEL TWO: GETTING THE MILK

Entering the store, I head straight toward the dairy isle. _It's just a carton of one percent milk, how hard can it be? _I ask myself; little did I know just how hard it could be.

I reach the dairy coolers and instantly go to searching for one percent. _Okay, so there's skim, chocolate, 2%, whole, where in the _heck_ was the 1%? _Then I saw it, the little section of one percent milk, right between the almond and rice milk, _odd spot for one percent..._I think as I walk over to it.

Grabbing the first carton, a trickle of milk starts down my arm. Cursing slightly, I replace the container and reach for the next one; however this one refuses to move. I try jiggling it, and pulling it, but after 3 minutes of failure, I move to the next column and grab the first container there. Luckily it comes out without a hitch, and grabbing it, I make my way to the check out.

**~oOo~**

BLAINE POV:

It's been 20 minutes since we asked Kurt for milk, and we haven't seen him since, however the other attendant, Mercedes (?) has been in here a few times.

"Blaine-ward!" Calls Cameron. "Where is your cute little attendant with our milk? I want my cookies!" He whines.

"Okay…one, where did Blaine-ward come from? And two, how am I supposed to know? Just because I think he's adorable doesn't mean I know where he is at all times!" I exclaim in response.

"Blainey's got a cruuuussshhhh!" Nick and Jeff sing song, and I can feel my ears redden.

**FIN(N)?**

**A/N: So…I hope you enjoyed . –S (H was not involved in the writing of this…)**

**Review PLEASE? And suggestions are still needed. And would you guys like a sequel? Because we are nearing the end…sadly…**


	5. LEVEL THREE

**A/N: Sorry for the massive A/N…if you want to skip, you can, here's the summary: You are all amazing and I love you. Reply to an amazing anon (like my alliteration?) and the fact that I own nada.**

**OMG! I love you all! I asked (*cough cough* begged *cough cough*) for reviews and you complied and it made my day! I thank you for all of the reviews, story alerts, and favorites. It makes me smile every time I get an e-mail saying someone liked my story in some way :) (If anyone realizes I'm using I instead of we…it's because your love fuels me to update, so I haven't been checking in with H as much…Sorry H…if you're reading this…you know I live you!) Just thank you all soooo much :)**

**In reply to my lovely anon reviewer: I don't like that I put HIM in either…it's just, I try to make each chapter have a mini plot (even if it is EXTREAMLY mini) and part of the reason it took me so long to update is I was sitting here like… "What can happen on a walk down the block to add plot?" eventually I asked my friend R who was like "You can get mugged." And I'm like "That you can…" and then this came to mind and I was like "Plot development!" and yeah…don't worry, I don't plan on putting him back in, and the story can go back to happy humor. (And hopefully fluff in the sequel :) )**

**I LIVE YOU ALL! (That is autocorrect love for ya :) )**

**R&R por favor :)**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing…sadly… :( **

KURT POV:

One. That is how many checkout lanes they had open. And of course on that lane they have two extra workers who could open up another, but no. They decided that having a line of 20 people (12 of which with over flowing carts) is better than having 3 lanes with six or seven, because that's society for you nowadays. Mentally berating myself for my luck, I take my place at the end of the line and settle in for a long wait.

LEVEL THREE: CHECKING OUT

About 5 people make it through the line when something goes wrong. I'm assuming it's some form of coupon issue, and realize that it's going to take even longer as the lady checking out fights to save her extra thirty cents. Sighing dejectedly, I pull out my phone and text Mercedes.

**Me: How's 104B doing?**

Knowing it will take a minute for her to respond (she can't get caught texting on the job) I take the time to do a mental once over of what will need to be iced later. There are a few bruises on my ribs, but that's about it. It's not the worst outcome, but my waist will be fragile for a week or so. As I realize this, my phone buzzes with Mercedes's response.

**Mercedes: Ok. A little antsy waiting for milk. **

With a sigh I quickly tap out a response.

**Me: About that…its gunna be a little longer than expected, one lane + a lot of people = long wait to check out. Oh! How did things go with Brutus?**

Again, it takes a bit for a response, and when it comes, it's not the response I was hoping for.

**Mercedes: They didn't.**

Confused, I type a reply.

**Me: What do you mean they didn't?**

When my phone buzzes again, the response is not the one I was expecting.

**Mercedes: Brutus refused to go, he did however say he would loan you the suit and let you go.**

**Me: What!**

**Mercedes: Yeah. If you want your little Garbler buddies to see Brutus, you're going to have to be Brutus.**

**Me: Okay one: you're responding quicker and more fluent, and two: YOU EXPECT ME TO PUT ON THE BRUTUS SUIT!**

**Mercedes: One: I took a bathroom break, and two: only if you want to please those Garblers.**

**Me: Its Warblers.**

**Mercedes: Who cares? Do you want me to get the Brutus suit ready or not?**

**Me: ….fine….**

**Mercedes: Kk. Gotta go :)**

Sighing, I look up to see the line has decreased to only five more people ahead of me. Slipping my phone back into my pocket, I catch a glimpse of a metallic marker display in the isle. I make my way over to it, while still maintaining my place in line, and pull out a silver marker. Turning it over in my hands a few times, I decide to get it, because who knows, a marker could come in handy sometime. Stepping back into line, I see that it's down to three people, each with only a few items.

Before I know it, it's FINALLY my turn to check out.

"Is this all?" The girl behind the counter asks.

"Ye-" I begin before realizing that I forgot to grab cups, which being honest, if the stadium didn't have milk, it certainly wouldn't have cups. "Shit." I mutter, looking behind me I see the line has grown again to about six people, "Can I leave this here and come back?" I ask the girl, shooting her what I hoped to be a winning smile. She nods in response, so, setting down the gallon of milk and the marker, I step out of line and head for the isle with plastic cups.

**~oOo~**

BLAINE POV:

One. That's how many points we're ahead by. The other team has the puck and are probably about to score. But even as intense a moment as this Cameron still finds a way to be thinking food.

"Blaaaaaiiiiinnnneee!" He whines, "When is your lover boy going to bring me milk! I just want a cookie!" he exclaims, sounding like a weird mix of a two year old and a mocking teenager.

"Okay one, we've been through this. He is not my lover, I barely even know his name, and after tonight I'll probably never see him again. And two, we have the cookies, so if you really want one, go eat it without the milk. Or if you're just hungry, we do still have pizza and nachos in the box. And three, how can you be thinking food at such a pivotal-" I didn't get to finish my sentence because I was cut off by the loud buzzer that signaled the Buckeyes had scored.

"I can think about food because I'm hungry!" he replies, yelling over the buzzer.

"If you're so hungry, go eat some pizza!" I yell back.

"But you Mr. Smooth ordered mushroom! And mushroom is disgusting!" he says, as the buzzer has now stopped.

"I said I was sorry…" I mumble.

"It's okay." He soothes, putting an arm around my shoulder, "We all get tongue tied around our crushes. Most of us just have the sense to order normal pizza instead of mushroom."

**~oOo~**

KURT POV:

Cups in hand, I return to the checkout line. The good news is that the line is down to one person ahead of me, the bad news is the fact that their cart is positively overflowing. As I settle into line, the girl working the checkout catches my eye and sends me an apologetic smile, letting me know she understood my situation. I smile back and wait for the lady to finish checking out.

Three minutes later I'm being asked the same question I was the first time I made it here.

"Is that all?" the girl behind the counter asks, ringing up my items.

"This time, it is." I smile handing her the cups.

"Glad to hear it." She smiles back. "That'll be $9.57."

Smile still on my face I hand her a ten. "Thanks." I say as she takes it.

"Anytime." She replies with a wink, handing me my items. "Have a good rest of the night."

"You too." I say, making my way to the door and down the block.

I make it down the block and back into the building without a problem. I shoot a quick text to Mercedes telling her I'm waiting in the side entrance and to come with the Brutus suit.

Five minutes later I'm opening the door to Mercedes and the suit, when it hits me. "Cedes, I have an idea." I say, mischievous grin playing on my lips.

**FIN(N)**

**A/N: Dun. Dun. Duuuuuunn! Mwah ha ha ;) I am evil :) Leaving you with a cliff hanger like that :) But no…it's like 1:09 (AM) and I'm cutting myself off…that being said…don't judge for any errors, just please politely point them out :) Also, the next chapter will be the last, and then I'll probably do like a one-shot sequel type thing and…yeah. (This is kind of a one AM ramble type thing so…not 100% final…also; I have to confer with H…so…)**

**Leave a review please?**


	6. Quest complete

**A/N: Well…this is it…the last chapter. I just want to thank you for all the love :) I never understood when authors said that reviews fuel their writing, but it's true, it is so true. So read, review, and enjoy :) **

**Disclaimer: Not mine….**

BLAINE POV:

_Knock. Knock._

Opening the door, I'm greeted with the sight of Brutus carrying a tray of milk, and one extra in his hand. Instantly I feel my hopes fall as I realize I won't get to see Kurt again as the game was nearing the third period, and attendants stop attending then. But, I didn't get to wallow long, because soon after the door is opened, Jeff's shrill cry of "BRUTUS!" is ringing through the box, and he's wrapping his arms around the mascots waist. I'm not sure, but I think I hear an "ouch" as Brutus cringes away from Jeff's suffocating squeeze.

Once Brutus is released, he hands me the glass of milk that he was carrying, before reaching onto the tray and handing another to Jeff. Had I been paying more attention, I would have noticed how he chose who got what glass with special care, but as I wasn't, I simply called out "Milks here," before grabbing a cookie and settling down to enjoy it with my special milk.

**~oOo~**

Sipping my milk, I hear Wes chuckle. "What?" I question, only to be met with a sly smile. A few moments later, as I'm sipping from my glass again, I hear Nick snigger as he whispers something to Jeff. "What?" I question again, only to be met with a knowing look. The next time I take a sip, I'm met with the sound of David's laughter. "Okay, what is it?" I ask the group, who has all formed around me to watch me drink my milk, exasperated.

"Oh, nothing." Jeff says, nonchalantly taking a sip of his milk. As he does so, I catch a glimpse of something metallic on the bottom of his cup that looks strangely like my name.

"Wait!" I call out as he starts to put his cup down, "Let me see your cup." He hands it over with a look that shows he is clearly doubting my sanity, but I don't care. Lifting the cup above my head, I see that I was right. On the bottom in loopy script, is my name. "Okay, everybody check the bottom of your cup." I state. When I'm met purely with questioning looks, I hand Jeff his cup back and tell him to chug the remaining contents. He complies, albeit curiously. When he finishes, I gesture for him to hand me the cup again, which he does. Turning the cup over to show the group the writing, I say "That's my name. Now please check the bottom of your cups so I can see if there is contributing factors to this message." At this, every one downs their milk, including me, and flip the glasses over.

On the bottom of mine: (746) 384-9383.

In total, five of us had writing on the bottom of our glasses. When lined up the message read:

Blaine-

Call me (746) 384-9383

-Kurt

"Dude, you gotta do it." Breathes Cameron.

**FIN(N)**

**A/N: And there is the end of the story :) Don't worry, I will have a sequel :) I'll post in here when its up :) Sorry this is so short!**

**Review pweeeeeessseee :)**


End file.
